#TeaserTues – Out of the Blue Take-10? (I lost count)

I sought professional help

If you have been following along with my progression on Out of the Blue you know I have edited this thing almost to death.  I recently acquired the services of an editor and I hope with her help to put this book in the done column.  I know lots of authors don’t use their first book; maybe they use it as a learning experience and never publish, maybe they revisit it later or maybe they trash it half way through.  I would like to publish mine; not because I think it’s a great gift to the world but simple to say I published it.

My editor requested that I not attempt to edit my #NaNoWriMo book Her Unexpected Life and send it to her as is.  She wants to see how I write before I try to fix it.  I tried several strategies to edit Out of the Blue but couldn’t get a good rhythm so that’s why I hired an editor.  She has already pointed out several things to change that I thought were okay.  Oh and then there’s grammar my nemesis.  We have a hate/hate relationship with each other.  Commas vex me in my sleep, they say add me here, you know you want to.  I think they instigate characters taking over pov out of turn, too.  Or that could be caused by writing without an outline.  Who’s to say, really?  Oh, look I think I’m rambling.  If you’re still with me, here is a new and improved version of the selection of Out of the Blue I have been sharing with you fine folks.  Plus the previous versions links as well.

Out of the Blue December 8

Out of the Blue December 1

Out of the Blue September 29

Out of the Blue

Chapter One-Friday, November 14, 2014

Callisto slides through the currents as graceful as a ballerina, twirling and gliding around obstacles in her path as she makes her way to an unfamiliar beach. Knots of eagerness have afflicted her through her whole journey, but her anticipation for a better life away from the pod continues to propel her forward.

Upon waking that morning in her family’s underwater cavern from a sleep plagued with insomnia, Callisto sensed a change in herself. Her home seemed more sullied than normal by the way of life of her people. She felt only disgust for it, and them. She needed to start her new life to escape, even if it meant giving up life as a mermaid to do it.

Her mother’s urging once she heard of Callisto’s decision sealed her fate, and her father’s departure to another pod for business provided the perfect opportunity for her to slip away unnoticed. Her father fought against the idea of any ever leaving the pods.

All the youths of age from her people must choose to stay or leave—for girls: a decision by twenty-two moons; for boys: a decision by twenty. Callisto’s decision to leave today seemed planned by destiny, for only a short time remained before her twenty-second birth moon rose. It approached her rapidly, riding on the wings of possibility.

She reaches the shore and stumbles up onto the beach, looking more like a drunkard than a ballerina, her legs still weakened and trembling from her transformation. To steady herself, she reaches out to grab one of the posts from the pier, but misses. Her unsteady legs give out under her weight, crashing her into the sand where Callisto lays face down until she finally gains enough strength to roll over. She stares up at the moon, wishing on it for what feels like an eternity as she wonders if it will keep her secret.

The light from her only witness to her true-identity becomes blocked. It takes her a moment to focus on the obstruction that blocks her view. Surprise overwhelms Callisto when she makes out the obstruction.

It’s a man!

To get a better look at him she rises to her elbows and squints. Her witness backlights him, making fine details impossible to extract at this angle. He appears large and imposing, which should inspire dread in her, but, instead, kicks Callisto’s female instincts into gear.

He appears startled by her presence and inquires of her, “Are you okay?”

A nod is her only response.

“Do you need help?”

Callisto shakes her head, causing her wet hair to fling all around her.

He chuckles. “Well, as long as you’re okay. I’ll leave you to your … adventurous swim.”

2 thoughts on “#TeaserTues – Out of the Blue Take-10? (I lost count)

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